Here is a sad case that illustrates how negligent parents and an incompetent judicial system must share the blame when kids get into trouble. First, the facts of the case...
A 35 year-old man is renovating an apartment he owns for a new tenant. A number of teens are in the apartment while he's working. They're all drinking. A 17 year-old girl arrives to join one of her friends. The man renovating the apartment offers several of the girls, including this 17 year-old, money in exchange for sex. They refuse. The 17 year-old says she already has a boyfriend.
Eventually all of the teens leave except the 17 year-old girl. The man grabs the girl, pulls down her pants, and has sex with her. The man then leaves the apartment but, on his way out, he tosses the girl $10. The man is subsequently convicted of sexual assault and procuring a person under 18.
Before we proceed, let's make perfectly clear that we are in no way blaming the 17 year-old victim in this case. Not at all. Despite her obviously foolish and reckless behavior, as we'll see she was not to blame for what happened to her. The creep who assaulted her is plainly a degenerate who deserves whatever jail time he gets. But there is more to this story that merits our attention and that raises some important questions.
During the man's trial it was revealed that the girl he assaulted suffers from Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder (FASD). This is a condition brought on by prenatal exposure to alcohol, causing developmental problems. The prosecutor in the case explained that because of this disorder, the girl "processes information differently from others. ... She doesn't have the skills to deal with the situation, so she let it happen."
Also during the trial the girl presented a victim impact statement that her mother helped her write. In it she says she is scared of dark places, afraid of being alone, and afraid to drink with people she doesn't know.
Now some questions...
Where was this girl's mother when she was being assaulted? If she knew her daughter suffered from a psychological disorder shouldn't she have kept a closer watch on her? For that matter where were the parents of the other teenagers? Why did any of them let their kids hang out and drink at some guy's apartment? What kind of friends does the girl have that they would leave her alone with a man twice her age, pressuring her for sex?
We said we wouldn't blame the victim in this case. Instead, we'll blame her vacuous mother. Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder occurs because the mother drinks while she's pregnant. With the information available today, and even with the information available seventeen years ago, that is just undeniably stupid.
We'll also blame the legal system that ties parent's hands.
Some of our friends have teenagers, running wild, out of control. They'd like to do something about it. They've tried to keep their kids out of trouble. But the judicial system has given more rights to the children than to the parents. Discipline, the old-fashioned kind practiced generations ago and that senior citizens will tell you worked so well, is now a no-no. Give your kid a spanking and you can end up in jail.
Still, there's another reason we'll blame the mother in this case. Judging by the victim impact statement she helped her daughter write. she's apparently still allowing this underaged, developmentally handicapped girl to drink. Will it stop when the girl gets pregnant? Probably not. Her child too may suffer from FASD and we may see this pathetic cycle repeat itself.